Social Mask...

2/19/2013

Do you act differently depending upon who you are with, where you are or what you are doing? That's your social mask, we all have one.

Calpurnia has been with the Finch family since the children were very young. When going to Cal's church, Scout and Jem learn that there is another side to her. How and why does Cal act differently when she is around the Finch family in Maycomb and another way when she is with her own family on the other side of town? Why do you think she puts on a social mask?

Do you think that people change their behavior according to whom they are with? If so, why might they change their behavior?

55 Comments

Amber Truitt

2/20/2013 09:59:25 am

Cal acts differently at the church compared to at the Finch's by her talking. Cal is very well educated but when she is at church she is surround by people who don't have the same level of education. I think she talks like them at the church as a sign of respect. When she doesn't talk all "proper", she is showing them she doesn't think of herself any better than them as people. Also, by doing so she makes it easier to fit in with everyone. Just like Calpurnia, people do change according to who they are with, mainly to fit in with the group.

Ms. Moore

2/20/2013 11:06:10 am

Amber, what a great point you make about the respect Calpurnia has for those around here.

Jorge brito

3/19/2013 11:26:15 am

you are right people do change according with who they are! greats points!

Emily Todd

2/20/2013 10:16:48 am

I always act differently depending who I am with. I am more outgoing with the people that I am closer to.
Calpurnia acts diffferently with the members of her Church because she wants to be treated equally. Calpurnia knows that if she acts like white people act, the people of her church will scorn her. She doesn't want to make her friends angry by making them feel inferior. Calpurnia feels comfortable enough to act more educated around her white "family" because that is what they expect.
People constantly change their behavior depending on the people they are with. Some reasons for this are to please and to meet expectations. People want to act appropriately given their setting to not seem out of place. It is all about fitting in.

Taylor Mooney

2/24/2013 06:56:27 am

I think that this is a very good point. I think that people act differently to fit in. But, the people who you are most comfortable with are the people that you act yourself around. I think people do this because they know that their best friends will except them no matter what.

Haley Wolfersberger

3/11/2013 11:04:15 am

That is a great point Taylor. Once you find the people you are the most comfortable with it makes being with people you aren't so close with easier because you know that someone accepts you for being you so it doesn't matter what this other person thinks. You should be yourself around everyone and not have to act differently to fit in.

Mady Eutsler

3/11/2013 05:59:53 am

I agree completely, fitting in is definitely a main drive to putting on a social mask and the level of confidence in those that you are with will definitely affect which "mask" you might put on.

Angela C

3/16/2013 07:08:07 am

i Agree

Maria Gianelle

3/16/2013 07:05:04 am

I think Emily put it perfectly because it is all about fitting in and meeting expectations. No one wants to be told they are not good at something. That is why Calpurnia acts differently around her different families.
I think it would be interesting if one day we didn't need a social mask. If people were just themselves all the time.

Abigail Thomas

2/23/2013 10:08:43 am

I must say, I do act completely different when it comes to certain people I hang out with. If it's somebody I just met, or have never talked to, I would act with manners, and try to make a good first impression on the person. But, once I get to know somebody, and talk to them for a while, I can begin to act like myself around them. People change their behaviors to who they're around with because some people might not be comfortable with other certain people. People couldn't be comfortable with certain people because of who they are, past events, or just being judge mental on that person.
Calpurnia acts differently with her fellow, church members because she wants to be treated equally, like everybody else there. Calpurnia is higher educated than the people that go to her church. So she has to put on a mask so that she can fit in at her church, just like how she puts on a mask while she is at the Finch house.

Taylor Mooney

2/24/2013 07:03:39 am

I think that Calpurnia acts different around her church family and the Finchs because everyone wants to be accepted. No one wants to feel like they are not wanted or they are left out of things. In order to prevent this feeling, people mold themselves into what other people want them to be. They act different based on the people they are with. This is why I think that Calpurnia acts different around both families. If she acted african american around the Finch's they would not treat her the same. The same with her church family, if she acted white around them than she would be frowned upon and not excepted. People act themselves around the people they are most comfortable with. This is why I think Calpurnia acts different around both of her "families."

Tara Ward

2/26/2013 08:31:07 am

I agree with Taylor. Human beings are definitely born wanted to be liked and accepted by at least someone. For some this desire to be needed or to hide oneself is more intense due to past experiences and natural disposition. Its kind of sad that Calpurnia has to act all the time. I wonder if their is anyone or anywhere she can be herself? In fact we don't know much about Capurnia. Does she feel blessed to have two "families" or does she not like having to always act? Actually I wonder if Calpurnia acts at all around the Finch family. She seems as close as one of the family as one could get.

Ms. Moore

2/26/2013 10:07:17 am

Amber, Emily, Taylor and Tara: If you were to make an inference, based on what you know about Calpurnia, where/when do you think she feels most herself?

Jenna harbinson

2/27/2013 06:21:27 am

I think people defiantly act different when they are around certain people. There's a girl who I used to be friends with but then I saw how she acted with teachers so I decided not to be friends with her because I thought that's how she was going to treat me. Granted this was like 4th grade and at that point in life we were all acting like we were 5 years old and we all wanted to be the class clown and the center of attention. As we grow up we learn how to act around people And so that's how we have social masks.

Christeena Linton

3/2/2013 01:52:06 am

I agree with you. Your incident reminds me of a friend I used to know who acted the same way. After that incident, I didn't want anything to do with that person anymore.

alana stanford

3/2/2013 11:31:03 pm

I think this is a common occurrence in a young girls everyday life with friends. I absolutely agree.

Angela C

3/16/2013 07:08:47 am

i also agree with this statement.

Allison Franklin

3/16/2013 04:37:27 am

Jenna, I totally understand and agree with what you are saying. I have had similar experiences to the one you described. I think that situations like those happen a lot more nowadays and I find it very sad. It's disappointing to think you know someone and then realize that they are a completely different person than you thought.

Andrew Hoeck(Bob)

3/17/2013 09:23:52 am

That is something that life is about, developing your own views on a person or aspect that is your own and not just based on what someone else says

Emily Todd

2/27/2013 09:20:17 am

I think she feels most comfortable with the Finch family minus Aunt Alexandra. She has raised them and lived with them. Cal almost knows the Finches better than her own family. Because she spends so much time with a white family, I don't think the black popultaion really accepts her anymore. I think she appreciates Atticus and the way he treats her.

Christeena Linton

3/2/2013 02:03:28 am

When I was younger, I used to act differently around people I didn't know. I used to be a very shy person because I was different from everyone else. At least, that is what I was thinking. But now, I'm not as shy anymore. I stand up for myself and for other people more. I'm still a quiet person though because that's just apart of my personality. Calpurnia acts differently around Atticus, Jem, and Scout because African American's were required to. You had to treat white people with respect or their could be bad consequences. Around her race and people she knows, she is more comfortable and laid back. If she wasn't, her friends and neighbors would probably think it's weird that she isn't acting like herself.
I think people do change their ways and act completely different around certain people they know because they are afraid of what that other person might think of them. I've had a couple of friends who would act all friendly around me one second and then "change" when they had their friends with them.

Cara Kirn

3/4/2013 11:11:03 pm

I agree with you completey. When I was younger I was shy too so yes I think people act differently around certain people and there really isnt anything wrong with that. As long as your being yourself.

Abigail Thomasa

3/12/2013 11:07:43 am

I agree completely, many people act different around different people. And good job at standing up for people! TAKES COURAGE.

Ian VanGenderen

3/4/2013 09:38:51 pm

I think that it is almost necessary to wear different "masks" depending on who you are around because without these "masks" you are not going to be able to function properly. This is due to the fact that everyone has different things that they desire. An example is that you would never cuss around your parents, but around your friends it is perfectly ok. This is an example of a "mask" that you put on depending on who you're around. Also without these "masks" you will offend some people, although that's ok sometimes, you shouldn't do it all the time, especially if you are around a superior or someone you hold in high respect you try to appease them and give the best impression towards them. So to say that you are always yourself is a lie because you may keep some traits no matter what "mask" you are wearing you must change some things in order to fit in and be respectful to your audience that you're around at the time.

megan trader

3/12/2013 05:44:27 am

yeah i agree. with social masks, you are not able to function as properly as you may want too.

Kaely Whittington

3/16/2013 10:55:00 am

I really like your blog but I do disagree with you about not always being able to be yourself because of social masks. Though some people fit your description by having fake personalities when they are around certain people, not everyone is like this. People are made up of many different sides and just because they chose to show some sides and not the others in situations or show more of a side doesn't mean that they're changing them self as a person.

Cara Kirn

3/4/2013 11:07:00 pm

Cal says the reason why she acts different in front of people llike her. She says because she doesnt want them to know that she is different. If they knew she was smarter and brighter then they would hate her and then wouldnt want anything to do with her becuase she was too good for them. Though in some cases people act different in front of people if they want to fit in. They want to feel cool so they act different. They should really just want to be themselves but they want to fit in. I act different in front of people. Everyone does. If I'm close to someone I will be my true self and be crazy but if I'm not close to someone I will just not really say anything. If you call thast being someone being different. Your just not used to them.

kerigan mattox

3/17/2013 11:22:47 am

i agree that calpurnia was just hiding her other sides but she wasnt being fake.

Andrew Hoeck(Bob)

3/5/2013 12:44:44 am

Calpurnia acts differently because she is a black woman priveleged enough to read and write in addition to living with a white family that treats her as a person. She understands that she has been blessed with her gifts, and is not one to brag with them when around other blacks in her church. This can be related to people today, as many people act differently when they are around their family, friends, teammates, alone or in situations they don't agree with. It is those who are able to be themselves and make the decisions that they would make regardless of who they are around are the ones that gain respect from their peers.

Kelly Deehan

3/10/2013 11:01:09 am

I believe Calphurnia acts differently depending on where she is so she will not be treated as an outsider. If she had bad grammar and spoke in slang she would not give the impression of being an important part of the Finch household. She probaly wouldn't get the same respect. At her church though if she spoke like a white person , they would think she was trying to act above all the other blacks and make them feel lowly. Cal is just pleasing everyone by doing this. I sometimes do this as I am sure everyone does. I act differently with my family than with teachers or other adults. I am much more outgoing with my friends rather than around people who I think are going to judge me.

Maria Gianelle

3/16/2013 07:11:38 am

I think Kelly is right when she says that Cal is just pleasing everyone by doing this. She wants everyone to be happy. And I know that the social mask is usually worn by cowardly or deceitful people, but in this case does Cal's mask seem so bad? She is just trying to get a long with everybody.

Bobby Noonan

3/10/2013 11:32:45 pm

She does act differently at her church ten when she is around te finches. I think she does this because it is a different environment she is in. When she's at the finches she isles formal and more business like because it is her place of employment. Also it is a different crowd. At church they may not be as educated as the finches and because of that she speaks differently. I think we all act differently depending on who we are around and do different things when we are with different people. I see the most difference in people when they are in front of there parents and when they aren't.

Ian VanGenderen

3/14/2013 10:51:07 am

I agree with you Bobby on why she wears these different masks from day to day living. Do you think it could also be to not offend the less educated of her friends?

Maggie Moore

3/17/2013 11:25:18 am

I think that is an excellent point. She has to live in a community with those people, so it would hurt her and her status in the community if she were to offend the less educated members.

Madison West

3/16/2013 07:37:24 am

I totally agree that most people act differently depending on the environment they are in and the people they are around. Good job Bobby

Madison West

3/17/2013 03:22:44 am

I like that you captured the aspect of different environments influencing people's personalities and actions. Nice job Bobby

Mady Eutsler

3/11/2013 05:54:38 am

I'm definitely always different depending on who I'm with. Calpurnia is different because people are different and situations are different and she has to adapt herself to the different situations she's in. She puts on a social mask because that's what expected of her at this time.
People definitely change on who they're with because of the level of confidence they have in the people they're with. If they don't really know them, they might be shy and reserved but if they're with someone they've known forever, they're going to be a lot more open and more of their personality is going to show, no matter what the personality is.

Morgan Conte

3/16/2013 08:23:05 am

I completly agree. Everyone is going to act different depending on who they are with, no matter what there personality is. Everyone wants to feel accepted.

megan trader

3/12/2013 05:43:43 am

i personally dont act different around other people. i voice my opinion and could care less what other people think about it. i dont let social opinions affect my opinion. but i dont think this is the case with other people. other people dont want to be judged and considered different in society so they go along with what others say.

Ian VanGenderen

3/14/2013 10:54:57 am

It's not necessarily about changing your opinion depending on who you're around, but how you present your opinion or express yourself. Yes, I see what you're saying here, but I don't think Cal changed her opinions on things just how she spoke and told everyone her thoughts. Like you'd speak differently to a teacher than a close friend.

Jona Katzke

3/17/2013 01:36:56 pm

I agree with you Ian. It's not about your opinion. It's about how you talk to someonet and how you interact with different people.

Jona Katzke

3/17/2013 01:39:12 pm

I agree with you Ian. It's not about your opinion. It's about how you talk to someonet and how you interact with different people. I think we all have social masks.

Keniya Walker

3/12/2013 11:35:30 am

It is necessary to put on social mask based on the environment they are in. It is important to stay true to yourself but behave in a professional manner hen necessary. Although you can have a humorous side you do not want to show up in court and try to be funny when its a serious event. So you just put on your social mask and go into court and be personal and serious and your less likely to have results that will rule in your favor. Its perfectly fine to remember you are a funny person just know when to show that side. If your with your friends your don’t have to be as serious as if you were in court. Just as when Cal is in church she acts like her peer she doesn’t speak as proper as she does while at the Finches house, I think this is because at Church taking proper would be a little strange considering most people in her church cant even read. Atticus is more educated and she just cant talk to him any kind of way, that’s why she is more proper in his household which is also more professional.

Ian Van Genderen

3/14/2013 10:57:13 am

Yes Keniya this is a perfect explanation and example of a social mask. Very good.

Angela C

3/16/2013 07:09:38 am

i agree with your statement keniya

Tiffany-Jade Smallwood

3/17/2013 12:29:41 am

I agree with Ian, great explanation. Thank you.

Angela C

3/16/2013 07:19:30 am

I most defiantly , think that it is okay to act different depending on who you are with. Too me that shows the levels of respect you have for someone. For instance , the way i talk to my mom is not the same way i'll talk to my best friend that's just respect. When Cal goes to church she speaks proper because she doesn't want to offend anyone with her intelligence knowing that they did not have the same opportunities she has had to learn the proper English and how to read.

Madison West

3/16/2013 07:34:51 am

I think social masks are mandatory to have a properly functioning society. Some people don't know when it's the right time to put it on. I know for a fact that I act differently to my teachers and peers than I do to my family and close friends. A social mask is necessary when meeting someone new. When you meet a person for the first time you are usually pretty reserved. You don't really know the kind of person they are so you act as respectful as possible. For Calpurnia, I think that she acted so differently towards the Finches then she does to her friends in her community because with the Finches, it's business. Yes, she has been a part of their family for a while, but she still works for them. Calpurnia knows that she needs to be respectful. Around her friends, she is free to be who she is. I feel like most people act the same way she does.

Morgan Conte

3/16/2013 08:20:47 am

Cal acts differently when she is at the church because she wants to feel accepted by the members of the church. She is more educated than most of them and she doesn't want them to think that she thinks she is better than them. When she is with the Fitch family she acts more educated because Atticus is more educated. I think everyone acts differently depending on who they are with because they want to feel accepted.

Susana Padley

3/17/2013 02:59:46 am

I agree 100%. Everyone acts differently depending on who they are around and how comfortable they are. Cal felt that she could not act educated so that she would not be "above" the people from her church.

Kaely Whittington

3/16/2013 10:13:28 am

I think that we all act differently depending on whom we are around and what we’re doing. For example, if we acted the way we acted with friends while at work and took things easy and addressed people the way we address our friends, we probably wouldn't be regarded as good workers because we lacked a professional attitude. If we acted the way we did at work around friends, people would perceive us as boring or even snobby. Calpernia realizes this and has two social masks so that she’s able to have a professional attitude when she’s with the Finches and a down to earth attitude when she’s around he friends. If she only had one way of acting, she wouldn’t be able to have friends while working with the Finches or vice versa. I think we have social masks so that we can do well in many different areas rather than just one.

Susana Padley

3/17/2013 02:37:33 am

Calpurnia acts very different in her church than she does in the Finch household. I think she does this because the people in her church are not educated and do not know how to read and speak properly. With Calpurnia being well educated, she does not want to "show off" to her friends and peers. Maybe Cal does not want them to think that she thinks she is above them. In my opinion, everybody has a social mask and will only act like themself when they feel comfortable. When I am in an umcomfortable situation or around people I may not know well, I do not act the way I would around my close friends and family. I think it is unfortunate that everybody has a social mask because then people do not know you for who you actually are and they do not see the real person inside.

Maggie Moore

3/17/2013 11:20:08 am

I wouldn't say I act different depending on who I am with. I strive to be me around everyone. The only time I consciously act different is when I don't know a person. Then, I am shy and timid. Otherwise, I am rather outgoing. People may change their behavior because they don't want a certain group of friends to judge them for their one side that hey do not show to them. However, I have been taught to be proud of who I am and to not pretend to be something or someone I am not.

Kerigan Mattox

3/17/2013 11:20:25 am

whoever i am around, i try to act myself. i think it is ver important to be yourself. if your around people that is different than i think it is okay if you try to relate with them but you do not have to change your personality because if they decide to be your friend than they arent friends with the true you. Calpurnia is not changing her personalities she is just make one stronger than the other. with her colored folks she brings out her socialbility and when she is with the finches she is more caring and hardworking. All of it is Calpurnia though, she doesnt act fake around different people. she just relates differently with different people.

Jona Katzke

3/17/2013 01:10:37 pm

We all have several social masks. Calpurnia has one for the church and one for the Finch household. Calpurnia is very educated and she has to be a good example for Scout and Jem at home. At the church she is with people that are less educated and she doesn't want them to feel bad about theirselves so she talks slang with them.
I have social masks, too. I behave differently in school than at home, or when I'm with friends. I think the way we talk to someone depends on the person and on the relationship.

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